Our Last Gig: Las Vegas

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No, we didn't make it on the marquee. We did, however, urinate beneath it's sublime neon glow---so we got that goin for us!


Rolled into Vegas around sundown, or I should say rolled past Vegas! Texas Station is located way North of town, right between the What the Hell? and Where the Fuck Are We? highways….

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Kimm checks in. What a world, when yer 3rd billed under Bingo!

Loaded into the South Padre lounge and then immediately headed to the all you can eat buffet:

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The Feast Around the World. Tomorrow: the Loose Bowel Movements Around Interstate 15

Tell me: What makes us eat like ravenous kennel dogs when we are unleashed upon an open buffet?
I mean, at home you probably wouldn’t consider a weekday dinner consisiting of menudo, baklava, pasta puttanesca, sushi and crawfish etoufee—would you?

Oh sure, you try to start off sensibly. You have a simple entree, maybe a few crunchy appetizers…

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Spaghetti. Meatballs. Fried Shrimp. Crab Cake.

…but, what’s that? TBone found some Cajun food over in the corner next to the frosty machines!

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Gumbo. Jambalaya. Dirty Rice.

And, huh? Seafood?!–oh, right, it’s Friday! The chilled seafood bar is in full swing, and though I would usually question the wisdom of eating raw oysters that have been sitting in the bacteria biodome that is a las vegas casino, it seems naturally fine tonight! Did I mention we’ve been drinking?

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Crab Legs, Oysters, Shrimp.

Things begin to blur at this point. Not even hungry, we eye the plates of the people who have just returned from the buffet, only to bolt out of our chairs and head back to the food! Wait’ll the fellas get a load of this plate!!

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Pizza. BBQ Ribs. Chicken.

Things have gotten silly now. Nationalities and flavors, entrees and desserts—they have all begun to melt together in our contest of culinary one-upmanship!….

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Collard Greens, Chow Mein. Bean Salad.

Thankfully, we slow down, and eventually stop eating altogether. We come together in silence as we behold the mesmerizing sight of Tbone tackling an endless supply of crab legs!

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TBone tries the utensils provided to extract the crabby goodness.....

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...only to abandon the tools and use the mouthful of weapons the good Lord blessed him with....

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...urp? Bird gets a little ahead of himself and swallows a oyster shell sideways.

Then we played the show.
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Saturday: Up and at em, down to the casino floor for load out and a lil video poker!

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10am, back at the bar, and the fellas are hungry for breakfast!

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Bloody Mary? check. Coors Light? check. Fatburger with fried egg? Oh hell yes!

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Tomorrow we start the diet my little monkeys--but for now, mangia, mangia!!

Alright then, great roadtrip, guys!

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~ by CH3 on November 13, 2009.

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